Session one:- Go to Pub after training, Eat large cheese Burger and large Chips with plenty of mayonase? Followed by several pints of Larger untill you feel slightly mystical, and undefeatable. Time to leave before Shit hits the fan.
Session two:- After training go to Indian eat big hot curry whilst drinking three pints of Kingfisher. go home streight to bed, and wait, if nothing happens then your fine, however somtimes a spiritual ritual is required in the toilet, whilst chanting the following incantation:- Hue He yuk blurbal fuk that.
Session three:- This must be done seated and on days when physical training is not partisipated in. Sit on nice upright chair, with nice table about solar plexus high. Wait and meditate then a divine meal will suddenly appear infron of you, on the biggest plate you have in the house. Ensure that you have copious amounts of Beer on hand as this training session will make you very thirsty. Eat big meal, take a little walk to kitchen and eat any left overs from the meal. Visit the big white fridge and take from it the ready made ice cream and cover it with chocolate sauce. Return to lovley chair and eat all the ice cream. The next bit of this session is hard, you will need to stand up and fall in a controlled way into the soft easy chair infront of the Television. Once in easy chair close your eyes and beging to meditate Er I mean sleep. When you wake, beging to eat toast covered in stuff you like, wash down with more beer, then go back to easy chair and meditate once more, stay in easy chair untill morning , then resume the physical training sessions.
These techniques can be dangerouse and may damage your health but they have been proven by many obese people around the world and very sucessfully I may say. Good Luck with your belly training, You will feel uncomfertable somtimes during these sessions but stick to the training schedule and you will get a belly like mine.